Band Of Chummers

Season 2, Episode 4: The Grass Is Always Greener

Wednesday, June 1st, 2072

Scene 1: Chicago Unlimitech facility. Without much fanfare, four members of The Collective are flown to O’Hara airport via a Qantas marked jet plane. Upon arrival, they are greeted by Linnea Kuchci and Lt. Briggs; Knight Errant officers who are part of the OSP.

The Collective aren’t given much time to settle in. They begin duty immediately, guarding the premises from intruders. The Collective take things slowly for the first two weeks, waiting for Phillip McKraken to arrive.

During the first two weeks, the team learns a few interesting things,

  • Mellora assenses that several of the other security guards are secretly bug spirits.
  • Dr. Bliss is trying to sell research samples on the black market.
  • The algae in one of the research rooms is dying and needs to be replaced.
  • One of the research assistants, Daytona, has been acting very strange.
  • Absent-minded Dr. Taylor keeps forgetting his passcodes and has to write them down in a notebook.
  • There is a big 4th of July BBQ planned. On that day, most of the team members will be responsible for the security of the facility.

Scene 2: Unlimitech Facility. The Collective orchestrate a plan to make a copy of Dr. Taylor’s notebook. Magni gets Popa to switch spider shifts with him. While Dr. Taylor is in the shower, Coco Savage sneaks into the room and grabs his notebook. He then takes it to a nearby security camera and flips through the pages, allowing Magni to make a digital copy. Coco returns the notebook without anyone noticing and Magni shares a copy of the notebook with all his teammates.

The notebook is a disorganized mess and none of the passcodes are labeled properly.

Meanwhile, the first couple weeks, CoCo spends a lot of time helping Chef Guyon in the kitchen.

Scene 3: Unlimitech facility animal pen. Phillip tries to get the animals of the pen to mutiny using his animal handling skills. With the exception of Snowball, the animals seem quite content to stay in captivity. Phillip finds the dogs to be the hardest to convince because they are not there for animal testing, but for security. He uses magic to influence the dogs, making them fearful of becoming vessels for bug spirits. Phillip is able to convince the dogs to escape, but only when they get the signal.

Scene 4: Unlimitech facility. Inside the facility, the team gets to work on gathering information and preparing to take advantage of the July 4th bbq. The Collective are able to,

  • Zero spends his time fixing the drones and re-enabling their rigger adaptation hardware.
  • Zero builds a make-shift RCC from the materials in the workshop
  • Lion-O uses the drones and the RCC to get a complete picture of the layout of the research area and basement
  • Olo astrally projects through the opening in the wall. He manages to make it all the way down to the sub-basement where he finds test subjects Dustoo, Zulu Sands, and StrycNine.
  • Felix is able to infiltrate the armory and get his hands on some grenades.
  • Felix gains Daytona’s trust

Scene 5: Local Soybucks. Phillip agrees to help Dr. Bliss sell a package of Ares tech on the black market. While Phillip claims the buyer to be named Huge Mann, it is actually Phillip himself disguised with a Mask spell.

Phillip takes the package to a nearby Soybucks where he meets Ms. Johnson. He hands her the package and tells her about the things they have learned so far. Phillip also asks if she can help with an extraction on July 4th. Ms. Johnson promises to do her best, but it is uncertain she will be able to come through in such a short time frame.

July 4, 2072

Scene 6: Unlimitech Facility.

Scene 1: Loading Bay. The day starts off business as usual as a delivery truck drops off some crates in the morning as Conroy and Phillip are on duty. Conroy notices something amiss with the crates.

Later in the day, as the 4th of July festivities begin, CoCo, Rook, Conroy, and Magni are on duty. Lt. Briggs is commanding. Everyone else, including all the security guards and researchers are outside enjoying the BBQ.

Conroy decides to investigate the strange crates in the loading bay. He opens up one of the crates to find a live elf who is armed with an assault rifle. With the help of CoCo, Conroy subdues the elf after interrogating him. The team learns that the elf belongs to a shadowrunner team sent to infiltrate the Unlimitech facility and that inside the other crates are his teammates.

Conroy places heavy boxes on top of the remaining crates to prevent them from opening.

All this happens while Magni is distracting Lt. Briggs in the control room with an athletic jig.

Scene 7: Unlimitech Control Room. The Collective’s plan is put into action. Rook, CoCo, and Magni assault Lt. Briggs in the control room. Briggs reacts quickly and knocks out CoCo with a swift, but devastating hit. Briggs is a lot stronger than he appears. Briggs then turns his attention to Magni and hits him, but Magni is able to absorb the blow.

It takes three well aimed Colt M23 bursts from Rook to put down Briggs. Good thing the assault rifle was loaded with armor piercing ammo because Briggs was an insect spirit.

Conroy retrieves a stimpatch from the medical supplies and revivies CoCo.

Scene 8: Unlimitech basement and sub-basement. With Magni’s help opening the doors, CoCo and Daytona enter the basement and sub-basement, pilfering as much data as they can. CoCo is able to pick the lock to Dr. Bliss’s office and they grab data chips from her desk.

With Daytona’s encouragement, the Collective decide to free Dustoo and Zulu from their cells. Felix decides to leave Strycnine behind.

As the Collective regroup and decide on their next course of action, a loud explosion is heard from the direction of the loading bay.

Payout:
Karma Gain:
Notoriety gain:
Faction changes:
Contacts gained:
Other Items gained: Felix got some bug spray, Felix got some grenades, Zer0 crafted a Scratch-Built Junk RCC, a copy of Dr. Taylor’s notebook with all his passcodes, Mellora got a Colt M23 with AP ammo.
Items lost:

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Season 2, Episode 3: Bug Stomping

Saturday, May 7th, 2072

Scene 1: Surrender Da Booty. During leave, the squad has a social get-together at a pirate-themed family restaurant hosted by Carly. At the last minute, CoCo Savage decides not to go. The squad holds a beer drinking contest which is won by Jimmy Pike. Everyone celebrates Snooch Perkins’ birthday with pizza and beer.

Afterwards, most of the squad members agree to get glow-in-the-dark tattoos of the Knight Errant logo. Of the members of the Collective, only Lion-O agrees to get a tattoo which is done on his ankle.

During leave, the Collective also have a secret meeting with a Ms. Johnson about their mission objectives of gathering as much incriminating evidence of wrongdoing as they can find on their next assignment. Ms. Johnson hands them a file on their next target, Raquel Bliss.

Scene 2: The Barracks. Upon returning from a weekend of partying, the hungover squad finds an improvised bomb of balloons and jars filled with ominous substances placed in the middle of their sleeping quarters. With only 5 minutes until detonation, the squad agrees to use summoned spirits to deal with the bomb. Squad Leader Phillip McKracken casts an earth elemental to smother the bomb and then casts an air elemental to deal with the foul fumes. To clean up the mess, Phillip uses his chemistry knowledge and the chemistry labs to concoct a bunch of solvents and cleaning agents to remove the remains of the bomb.

The neighboring squad members seemed very disappointed at the minimal amount of damage that the improvised bomb caused.

Scene 3: Academy training fields, mess hall, and barracks.

Saturday, May 14th, 2072

Following Ms. Johnson’s directions, members of the Collective agree to throw the inter-squad football game, eliminating themselves from the tournament. Squad member CoCo Savage, who had up until this point, been the most valuable player on the team, fakes an injury to cause the team to lose. However, he forgets to sell his injury as no less than two minutes later, he runs across two fields to hit on a female from another squad.

Boomer is extremely upset at the loss and adds another reason to a long list of reasons why he hates CoCo Savage. Senior Drill Instructor Tavers’ dream of having one of his squads win the seasonal football tournament remains unfulfilled.

After the game, while in the mess hall, tempers flare as Boomer gets into a confrontation with members of the winning team from earlier in the day. CoCo is the first to join in on the fray with Conroy close behind. CoCo throws the first punch, or rather the first drop-kick, before anyone else even has their hands up. Conroy tried his best to restrain CoCo before things get worse, but it’s too late.

Member of both squads tear into each other. Five members of the other squad jump Donny Lee and Gamjee, beating them down. Backing up their squadmates, squad members Rook and McKracken join in the fight to even up the odds while Conroy releases CoCo and turns his attention to the other squad.

Rook, who has a thing for fighting trolls, challenges the biggest troll on the other squad. She tries her best but takes a powerful hit from the troll knocking her down. CoCo jumps across a table to Rook’s rescue.

The other members of Tavers’ squad try their best to help with Carly throwing food at the opposing squad. Ultimately, the fight is broken up by officers rushing to the mess hall and ordering everyone to stand down, but not before it is clear the Tavers’ squad was winning the fight. Afterwards, McKracken casts a heal spell on Rook.

Back in their barracks, Tavers chews out the squad demanding to know who started the fight. No one rats out CoCo so the entire squad is punished with excess physical training.

Scene 4: Academy training fields.

Wednesday, May 18th, 2072

During morning physical training, Boomer suddenly collapses for no apparent reason. He is taken to the infirmary but upon further examination there doesn’t seem to be anything physically wrong with him. He is held for observation.

A few hours later, with no update on his condition, Rook returns to the infirmary to check in on Boomer. Rook assenses Boomer and sees that his life signs are very disconcerting. Rook seeks out McKracken for his opinion on the situation. Phillip McKracken also assenses Boomer and recognizes that it is what his own body looks like while he is astrally projecting.

Realizing that Boomer needed to return to his body, the take Boomer’s body back to the fields where they use astral perception to look for Boomer. They spot Boomer flying about in the sky, looking very confused.

Rook successfully uses her leadership to direct Boomer back into his body. Boomer returns to his body and wakes up, confused and frightened. He doesn’t seem to be harmed in any way but he does have a lot of questions which Rook and McKracken answer. Rook and McKracken agree that it was all very strange.

Scene 5: Airport training facility.

Monday, May 23rd, 2072

Tavers leads his squad to a makeshift airport terminal where Knight Errant normally does training for airport security. But today is a special day because Knight Errant was able to acquire some hybrid-form insect spirits to use as target practice. The insect spirits have had their connection to their Queen broken, so they act erratically but they still pose a dangerous challenge.

Squad Leader Phillip McKracken chooses Rook, Savage, Conroy, and Narayan to be part of his team. Before going into the terminal, all the recruits are allowed to fully gear up for the encounter. Rook and Narayan choose the experimental Excalibur battle rifle as part of their loadout. Conroy chooses to command two rotodrones and an Ares Paladin drone.

Before entering, Phillip reminds everyone to go with armor piercing rounds. He also adds that usually insects fight with claws and that ranged attacks are uncommon.

Once inside the sealed off terminal, the team quickly locates the first of many insect spirits. It is some grotesque combination of a termite and a large dog. Conroy sends in a rotodrone and commands it to take a shot at the thing. The insect spirit scurries deeper into the terminal, out of the team’s sight. A couple more missed pot shots and the insect spirit retreats from view. Phillip astrally projects to find a spirit hiding around a corner. Phillip tries to communicate with it but fails. Phillip determines that the insects are not intelligent and are subject to termination.

Once the team has the insects backed into a corner, the insect spirits lash out and the real battle begins. The insects go for the closest target, that being Conroy’s rotodrone. The rotodrone takes solid damage, causing some feedback damage to get to Conroy. Conroy is forced to jump out of the drone before it is destroyed.

Rook’s Excalibur battle rifle overheats and melts the barrel as she tries to take a shot, forcing her to switch to her Enfield shotgun.

Phillip summons a Force 4 Fire elemental to join the fight. The elemental does a good job to drawing the attention of an insect spirit, containing it while other team members shoot the insect.

Both Savage and Rook take cover behind the Paladin while Savage lobs grenades at the insect spirits and Rook shoots them with her shotgun. The fragmentation grenades prove effective enough to take down the insect spirits in explosive fashion.

Phillip’s team completes the objective of clearing out the terminal of 5 insect spirits with only minimal injuries. Tavers is very impressed with the results, commenting that he underestimated them.

Next up is Boomer’s team. They don’t do as well, but they manage to complete the task of clearing out the terminal of 3 insect spirits. Duc Tran is mortally wounded and Phillip casts a heal spell to try to save him. The on-site medical team takes Duc away.

Scene 6: Graduation day.

Saturday, May 29th, 2072

New Vice President of Knight Errant Clayton Wilson gives a graduation speech. Rook graduates with very high scores. Savage and Conroy manage to graduate with somewhat less than perfect scores. Phillip failed his swimming exam and while he gets to attend graduation, he is required to remain at the academy for another two weeks before being released.

The recruits all have their family come to the ceremony. Savage’s sister is also present.

After packing up their gear, the grads are given their next assignment. All the members of The Collective are selected for the Office of Special Projects. Tavers asks to meet with them privately.

In Tavers’ office, Tavers reveals that he has lost contact with his previous recruits that have been assigned to the OSP. Tavers doesn’t know what is wrong, if anything, and asks the new grads to report to him if they can. Tavers then toasts the grads and wishes them well on their future endeavors.

Payout: 12,000 nuyen salary
Karma Gain: 24 Karma for 12 weeks of training
Notoriety gain: none
Faction changes: none
Contacts gained: Senior Drill Instructor Tavers (Loyalty 2/Connections 4)
Other Items gained: Lion-O gained a bio-tattoo.
Items lost: Some PCs spent some money.

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Episode 11: The End of Camp
Season 2: Episode 2

So… Badass Army Chick meets up with us during furlough and says we have to throw the upcoming Detroit Summer Camp Wellness Retreat and Boot Camp Extreme Football League game. Thank God! It’s rough when you’re carrying a team. This is why I like being in the background. I’m just going to fake an injury and hit on that troll I’ve had my eye on. Easy Peasy.

Seriously…her name is Peasy and she’s very …VERY easy.

But camp life ain’t so easy. After beating us, the squad from the Bunny House tried punking us at the cafeteria. I had to literally fly into action and save Melora with a Phenomenal Forearm. A while back she let me squeeze her butt and where I come from, that’s a sacred bond. Our two squads descended into a brawl that ended with the Camp Counselor getting really angry with us. It was worth it though.

Plus, he couldn’t be angry at us for too long: the Paintball challenge was coming up! I have to say: the fake guns, the bug monster costumes, and prop grenades were so realistic!! Even the makeup they did on Duc Tran’s “mortal wound” was otherworldly. This place is definitely getting 5 stars on Yelp!

Unfortunately, all vacations have to end. Now we’re back to work doing security for this lab that’s trying to fuse little homeless kids with animals. As cool as that might sound, it’s no cakewalk. The living conditions suck! We all rotate with sharing beds, there’s no contact with the outside world, and we have to clean ourselves in this open communal shower where we all can see—- WAIT! Did The Baron get a Tattoo!!!??

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Mellora's Journal -- S2E2: Bug Hunt
The Nightmare

He was in my dreams again, though I could not see him. I felt his presence, tinged with a sense of urgency, as if he were begging me to understand. To beware.

I stood in a large room. No, not just a room. Strange symbols adorned the walls, the floor. It felt… was it a place of worship? If it were, it was unholy.

I take a step, my booted feet clicking against the floor. The floor that now held a pile of dead bodies, their fresh blood spreading out onto the tile. I stepped back quickly, bile rising in my throat.

One by one, the corpses rise in a state of suspended animation. Not just corpses — corpses of children! Teens… and younger.

I take another step back.

A dark aura surrounds them. The zombie-corpses begin to transform. They double over in pain as huge sharp bristles of spiny black hair pierced through their skin. Their legs and arms change into furry tentacles, multiplying until there are four on either side of their grotesque, hideous bodies. Their heads flatten, and massive insect mandibles jut out with a gooey crunching sound from the base of their jaws as their eyes split and divide.

Gleeful laughter erupts behind me. A madman.

I sit up, ramrod straight in my narrow bunk. I place a hand on the cold cement wall to center myself. I fight for control — control of my breathing, my voice, and the panic rising in my gut. In the bunk to my left, Philip is snoring quietly. It was oddly calming.

I gather my senses and stumble out of the squadroom and jump into a shower. The hot water soothes me, and my breathing slowly returns to normal.

I’ve had vivid dreams all my life. And after that deadly day in Seattle, I’ve had plenty of nightmares. I’d become almost complacent since Raven took up residence in my dreams. But this time — it wasn’t just my nightmare.

Wide awake now, I tried to sketch the symbols I had seen. I’m a terrible artist, but I wanted to remember. Once I had done as well as I could, I went back to my bunk and failed miserably at falling asleep again.

Was it a message about the disquiet at the core of Knight Errant? I was reluctant to share my experience. What would the others say? It felt silly, somehow. And there are things that I simply don’t like sharing. I’m still growing accustomed to my own abilities, and it seems a deeply personal matter.

I sigh. I’ll bide my time.

  • * *

We just survived a bug hunt. I don’t like to think about where those bugs came from. I had to talk to someone. There was really only one choice.

One afternoon I asked Phillip if he’d like to go on a run with me. He didn’t seem very enthused, but I think the tone of my voice convinced him.

We did a cross-country jog, and when we had found a quiet place to talk, we took a break.

I told Olo about my dream.

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Season 2, Episode 2: Duty, Honor, Ares

Thursday, March 10th, 2072

Scene 1: Barracks. Squad Leader Rook has a talk with Recruit Gamjee. She is concerned about his lack of confidence. In an effort to boost his confidence, Rook sets up a pugil fighting match between herself and Gamjee. The match turns into a big spectacle as Recruit Duc starts taking bets as to who will with the match. Most of the bets are placed on Gamjee.

Recruit Rook does a good job of throwing the match while making it look real. Gamjee’s confidence is boosted from the cheers he received from his fellow recruits. All recruits either won or lost money on the match. Recruit Conroy donated his winnings to Gamjee.

Recruit Conroy makes a new friend in Recruit Narayan.

The team also discussed the ramifications of allowing Boomer the use of steroids. They decided that the risk was low enough and that it would boost relations with the disgruntled recruit.

Friday, March 25th, 2072

Scene 2: Urban terrain training area. After morning physical training, the full Squad gathers to participate in the Shoot Don’t Shoot training exercise. After weeks of learning the proper techniques of handling a firearm, the squad gets their first taste of live ammunition.

All members of the Collective score reasonably well, with Rook scoring the highest out of everybody with 180 points. The rest of the recruits also do well with the exception of Carly and Zulu.

As highest scorer of the training exercise, Squad Leader Rook is given first pick for the next phase of the training exercise, Capture the Flag.

Scene 3: Capture the Flag. In another, more expansive part of the urban training area, it is Rook’s team vs. CoCo’s team. Rook’s team consists of Rook, Phillip, Boomer, Magni, and Conroy. CoCo’s team consists of CoCo, Narayan, Donny Lee, Duc, and Gamjee. CoCo decided to start his team on the east side cordoned off area. Rook coordinates a diamond formation to give her team a slight boost in initiative.

CoCo’s team starts off aggressively trying to secure the intersection in the middle of the playing field. Both CoCo and Rook immediately run for and climb to the roof of the west building. Team leaders Rook and CoCo exchange a few paint rounds with neither side connecting.

Smoke grenades are thrown and players take cover behind barriers making it difficult to score any hits. That is until Magni peels off a well-placed shot taking out Duc.

Still, the fight was mostly a stalemate until CoCo surrendered to Rook, giving up his sidearm and removing himself from the event. Rook then used her superior height advantage to pick off Narayan and Gamjee. Magni finished off CoCo’s team by taking out Donny with another nice shot.

Boomer failed to score any hits, but dutifully retrieved the flag, giving Rook’s team a perfect 5-0 victory.

After getting chewed out by Drill Instructor Tavers, CoCo is relieved of his Squad leader position and is replaced by new Squad Leader Magni.

Later in the week, on the recommendation of Rook, her Squad Leader position is handed over to Phillip.

Karma Gain: 2 Karma for participating in Capture the Flag.
Other gains and losses: nuyen from betting on the pugil fighting match.

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Episode 10: Summer Camp!
Season 2: Episode 2

Dear Diary,

It’s been a rough couple of weeks at camp. Being squad leader ain’t as cool as it sounds. The camp counselors always yell at me and my crush has been plugged by every other dude here. Plus! I’ve been so busy with training and caring for my squad that I’ve forgotten to most important thing about camp: FUN!

I hope things change soon because I am really sad.

Best,

-CoCo



Dear Diary!

It’s happened! I’m no longer squad leader! M̶e̶l̶o̶r.. Rook beat my team fair and square at a capture the flag event and I’ve been demoted. YES!!! Time to really experience camp. What should I do first?… I wonder if they have a scrapbooking class..

EEEEE!(excitement)

-CoCo

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Season 2, Episode 1: Das Boot Camp

This episode marks the beginning of season 2.

Tuesday, February 22nd, 2072

Scene 1: Jantico Medical Clinic. The Collective pay a visit to Samuel Perettico for help in removing the tracking device implanted in Lion-O’s right thigh. While under the knife, a knock on the door by Knight Errant Detective Lydia Bowman goes unanswered. Detective Bowman and her partner pick the lock and enter the clinic and encounter the waiting members of the Collective.

After a tense confrontation, Detective Bowman warns that their plan isn’t going to work and that she would help them escape if they agreed to work with her. Lydia Bowman explains that as long as Knight Errant has a fresh material link in the form of a blood sample, they can use ritual magic to track “The Baron.” Bowman says that they need to move before the ritual begins. Realizing they may have no other choice, the Collective agree to play along.

Scene 2: Secret safehouse. Detective Bowman leads the Collective to a small, dirty safehouse that’s not only electrostatically and electromagnetically shielded, but also shielded by a force 10 magic ward. Detective Bowman says this is where Lion-O needs to hide until his blood sample deteriorates to the point where it’s no longer an effective material link. She thinks 48 hours would be enough.

The team gets a moment to collect their thoughts before Detective Bowman returns to share the rest of the plan. She speaks of a mysterious benefactor who is willing to hand wave away all Knight Errant records relating to the team. In exchange for this service, the Collective is asked to go on a deep undercover mission.

Seeing no other way out of this, the Collective accept the mission offer. The team is asked to infiltrate Knight Errant itself and collect evidence that proves their employer’s suspicions about the inner workings of Knight Errant. Each member will be given a new rating 6 SIN and a plane ticket to Detroit so they can attend Knight Errant Training Academy.

The team’s orders are to do as well as they can at the Academy to facilitate their assignment to the secret location that they will need to investigate for the second half of the mission. It is expected that the whole operation will last 4 to 5 months.

Pay for the mission is 10,000 nuyen each on top of the pay the team members will receive while working for Knight Errant.

It’s clear that Detective Bowman is no longer concerned with municipal police work, but believes in a bigger conspiracy theory that something has maliciously infected the very core of Knight Errant. She is willing to put her career on the line to prove it.

Scene 3: Knight Errant Training Academy. The Collective is sent to Detroit to attend Knight Errant Training Academy.. After a short introduction movie to get the recruits pumped up, they take a physical and a psychological exam. The recruits are then given a crew cut and uniforms before being directed to the barracks.

At the barracks, the recruits meet Senior Drill Instructor Tavers and Drill Instructor Sammons. After a short introduction, the Drill Instrucotrs leave, giving the recruits a little time to mingle before bedtime.

The next day, the recruits are physically tested. First up, the recruits are timed as they complete the obstacle course. Recruit Savage and Recruit Boomer tie for the best time. Because Recruit Savage showed leadership in trying to encourage his fellow recruits to do better, he is awarded Squad Leader. Recruit Carly and Recruit Phillip failed to complete the obstacle course.

Next up, the recruits are pitted against one another with pugil sticks to see who is the toughest. In the finals, it comes down to Recruit Rook and Recruit Boomer. Recruit Boomer is denied Squad Leader a second time as Recruit Rook defeats him to become co-Squad Leader with Recruit Savage.

Squad Mates
Boomer Harrison
Narayan Gupta
Olivia Croft
Donny Lee Jenkins
Gamjee Ganders
Tom Brady Jindal
Duc Tran
Snooch Perkins
Jimmy Pike
Carly Vuitton
Zulu Sands

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Episode 9: Summer Camp!
A look into the mind of Felix

This is why I became a Shadowrunner: you never know where you’re going.

After blowing up the club Denver style, Lio—-The Baron invited the group over to his house to celebrate. When I got there, he and Olo were already high off their asses on novacoke talking about how they shared an 18 year-old hooker together. These guys are fricken CRAZY!! Naturally I had to get high too. Then something weird happened: They started to talk about “teaming up more”………… I…..I think they want to share a hooker with me…. Jesus Azteca Christ these guys are wild!!

Anyway, Melora and Zer0 showed up and they weren’t happy with me.. Apparently, Melora and The Baron needed this Kaz guy alive.. I’d messed up the team big time… Zer0 called me a douche… that guy just has a way of reaching me and I cried, yo’…… I’m so glad I have such a strong family of Shadowrunners. They all hugged me and gave me another chance…Especially Melora… she let me cup her butt for a full 20 minutes… Something to look in on later…

Now stronger than ever, my new family and I decided to take The Baron to the dentist. This dentist sure looks familiar…
I was minding my own business and eating crackers in the janitor’s room like I always do when suddenly there was some loud noise and Olo called me over. Apparently this soldier team wants to help us with something. They take us back to this really nice apartment and told us to wait. This badass chick comes back and told us that if we go to summer camp, she could fix The Baron’s and Melora’s problem… Denver is weird and I love it.

Cut to: 1,000 miles away and a buzz haircut later, the gang and I are at camp in Detroit! This is so cool. The counselor is really mean though…I literally peed a little…

The first day we did an obstacle course and I WON!! Melora won the giant Q-tip fight tournament and now we’re both squad leaders! This is just like the movies! I found my rival. I found my summer crush. And I’m spending this all with my best friends! What could go wrong???!!

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Episode 8: Hardcore Felix
Felix decompressing after the club

Man today was friggin fun!

So fun, I treated myself to AzTaco Bell’s Crunch Wrap Supreme Combo© afterwards. I can’t tell you how great this thing tastes. Let me break it down for you:

At the center of this crunch wrap is a big disc of fried tortilla chip. This not only adds the much needed “crunch” to the wrap but also provides a base for the other ingredients to rest on as well background corn flavor.

On one side of the disc, is a thick layer of their hot delicious beef with the proprietary AzTaco Bell Seasoning© and melty nacho cheese.

To balance out the heavy meat and cheese, the other side of the crunchy disc features “supreme” sour cream, fresh diced tomatoes, and cool shredded lettuce. wow.

Around all of this wraps a soft, chewy flour tortilla that’s been pressed on AzTaco Bell’s special grill to seal in the wrap and add a little more crunch. Once you bite into it, everything mixes in your mouth and each flavor is perfect. I can’t believe they allow me to pay money for this. The Crunch Wrap Supreme is the ultimate portable Mexican meal.

Goddammit, I need to share this with my teammates… speaking of which…..where are they?

Oh, I met up with a sloot and blew up a building today!

God I love AzTaco Bell.

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Mellora's Journal - Episode 8: Chasing the Dragon
Dirty Work

The floor is slick with substances I’d rather not think about, and treacherous for my stiletto heels.

Beneath me, I hear “Katie Kaboom” simpering in the bouncer’s arms. I grit my teeth, roll my eyes, and simper back. “It’s okay honey, I’ll be right back, omg this is horrible!”

This must be some kind of commentary on my life in general. Olo and Lion-O get stoned and serviced by Katie Kaboom and — who was I supposed to be? Oh, right. Jessica Cakes. On the other hand, I get propositioned by an elf poser with floppy ears. And now I get to climb through Felix’s (literally!) bloody mess trying to salvage the entire operation.

Everything upstairs is in shambles. Blood and body parts, smoke and the strobes from the fire alarms. The room had been small — it looked like a bolt hole. Kaz was a sniper, he’d value his gun above all else.

And oh yeah, I lost my gun because of this mess.

Anyway, sniper = gun. No way he’d have it in another location. I rifle through the meagre remaining items. Cardboard box. Unlikely. Suitcase. I ran through possibilities… break-down assassin’s weapon. Maybe he’s got one of those fancy briefcase guns. The first suitcase was unlikely, but at this point I had to hurry.

I slip and slide my way over to the blasted hole in the floor. “Katie! Katie! Here’s your suitcase!” I toss it down and it lands with a thud.

“Oh! My stuff! You found it! Is there anything else!”

“Yes there is and you are so lucky we’re best friends forever!” I call back and resume my search.

Desperate, I rifle through the cardboard box. Nothing. My eye catches another briefcase. That’s more like it. Fine leather finish (a bit bloody now), but hard shell. And oh yes, jackpot! A biometric lock.

Biometric. Damn.

“You’re really really lucky I love you so much Jessie!” I call down. “I’ve almost got it!”

Biometric… there has to be… Ah yes. A finger.

I toss down the second case and stuff one of Kazuya Hitomi’s severed fingertips into… Right. Club dress. No pockets. I place it in my cleavage, and with a quick readjustment, hop down to the first floor so that “Katie” and I can make our escape.

From a block away, Olo and I gaze at the ruin of Club Karma, emergency lights glowing in the smoky haze. My new dress is a torn, bloody ruin; and I think I have gray matter under my fingernails. I don’t want to think about what I’ve got in my cleavage.

I bite back what I want to say, and instead tell him something more important. “Felix has to learn how to lay low, or he’s a liability. Our contacts are going to dry up.”

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